We all have our demons

I’ve never been one for extreme exercising. I tried a hotboxing class that lasted about a month. Every time I got up the courage to go, I would end up thinking I might actually die. Like, legitimately looking around at all the sweaty, toned, athletic people who belonged there and determine who would be the first to notice when I’m still on the ground after the last burpee.

No matter how terrible the class was, or, more appropriately, how terrible I was in the class,  I would always leave feeling like I could take on the world.  This euphoria would last for the rest of the day, before going to bed and waking up feeling like my same old self.

But I want YOUR addiction

When people speak of being “addicted to exercise,” I typically respond with “oh, that must be terrible for you.”  When in reality I want to say

“Are you freaking kidding me!?  Why can’t that be my addiction?  Why do I get stuck with the doughnut and Teen Mom marathon addiction?”

They then go into a story of how they swapped some drug habit for exercise, and I feel bad for being envious.

I don’t really have any other vices, other than the brain-numbing reality TV choices and sugar.  I should be grateful for that, but it’s hard not to be a little bit jealous of these people who can’t go one day without hitting the gym.

Why can’t the euphoria from a great workout stick in my brain and bring me back again and again like it does for them?

I have to tell myself that we all have our demons, and the exercise addiction these people are dealing with is not the blessing the rest of us think it is.  Too much of a good thing is never a good thing.

Unload that baggage

We all need to deal with our vices in a way that works for us, as long as that way is not hurting anyone, including ourselves.  If your gym habit is keeping you from things that will kill you, then lift away!  I have found that therapy is huge in helping me deal with my baggage, and discover the reasons why I eat when I’m feeling any emotion at all.  (Personally, I think everyone should go to therapy.  I mean, we all have parents, right?)

Hopefully, one day, I will be able to hit the pavement whenever I’m feeling down or just need a release.  But, as of now, I have to push myself every single time I put on the Raisin Renegades and head out the door…and that’s ok too.

 

Feature Illustration by jessicaweaverart